What?
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Posted:Sep 14, 2009 4:13 pm
Last Updated:Oct 27, 2009 12:36 am
6702 Views
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Did you know that Opposite Day is celebrated every year the day before Valentine's Day? Yeah, February 13th.
So I didn't know that it had a specific date and Rocky was taken aback when I blurted out the words I HATE YOU!!!
Over the past few weeks it's become an ongoing joke.
Another crazy day in the ER yesterday. I didn't have time to call him and tell him how much I despise him! I texted instead.
"Dear Rocky, I hate you so much it makes me wanna spit anytime I see your penis!"
I get this response back... I hate you so much too! I almost vomit when we have sex. Oh, by the way I'm in love with your brother and your nephew.
Much later I text back, "I always knew you were gay." I don't understand why you wanna puke during sex. It's not like "I'm" sticking "my" cock down your throat. I don't even have a penis, of course if you'd bothered to look you would know this."
Few minutes later, my phone buzzes in my pocket. I have to look at it later, too busy with the "swine flu" (NOT) to read it right now.
2 in the morning and I get to read my message, "We could always buy you one."
He makes me laugh and that's why I hate his fucking guts!
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Wild
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Posted:Sep 12, 2009 7:55 pm
Last Updated:Oct 27, 2009 12:36 am
6646 Views
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I was talking with my sister on the phone today and we were talking about how different things are now as opposed to when we were .
After I hung up the phone, the thoughts continued.
A typical Sunday for us was to go to church, go home and change clothes and go to my Mammaw's house. There were 11 first cousins to play with.
They lived out in the country. I can remember when the road to their house went from dirt, or mud to gravel. It's paved now but she and Pappaw have been dead for years.
They had a chicken coop. We'd get in the coop and pick up loose feathers. They had a bunch of banty chickens. Different colors, from dark green to almost red or yellow. I'd pick up the tail feathers and stick them in my hair.
We'd climb trees, mainly mimosa trees in the front yard. Their bark is sorta lathery and smooth so it doesn't hurt if you slip.
There was a spring down in the woods. Had the tiniest little craw fish in it. Only and inch or two long. Salamanders too.
Of course there was no municipal spraying of mosquitoes back then and I'd come back to the house EAT UP. The chiggers would get us too if we went to pick black berries, they grow wild here.
When we were old enough we'd take BB guns to the pasture. How we made these marksmen shots when we were like 10... we'd be 100 yards from a cow and shoot her in the hip just to make her jump. Hilarious when you're 10. Not so hilarious when the bull chases you into the hayloft!
On the way home with the chicken feathers in my hair, I'd lie down in the back window of the car and make faces at people in other cars once we got to the big highway, TWO lanes coming and going!
We'd get home in time for Walt Disney and Bonanza. We always ate at Mammaw's so for supper we'd have a boiled egg, carrot slices and maybe some raw cabbage wedges. Who woulda believed health food more than 40 years ago!
Had I been born 40 years after I was, I'd probably be mad because my parents made me go to the country. I'd have a cell phone and would be text messaging whoever I knew. I wouldn't go out to play because it was too hot. Climb a tree? Noway, too dangerous, I might fall. Lie in the back window of a moving vehicle? Nope, I'd be strapped in. Eat that for supper? Nah, we'd order pizza.
In some ways the good ole' days were better.
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Rewards?
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Posted:Sep 12, 2009 2:29 pm
Last Updated:Sep 14, 2009 3:29 pm
6700 Views
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I have a few questions to ask and none of them have anything to do with sex. I'm trying to get my head on straight about something.
Assuming that most of us here do work and do not work for ourselves...
1) Does your company reward you for setting new milestones in service?
2) Let's assume that your company is very busy and that all of your customers may NOT be pleased with you and complain that you need more staff so that the customer may not have to wait so long. What happens if you receive none of these complaints?
3) What would happen at your company if everyone who was surveyed after coming to your place of business rated their service as excellent or very good?
Would you get a raise? Would you be given an extra day off with pay because you worked so damn hard?
Please tell me you would get more than 2 mylar balloons and some cookies!
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My Bucket List
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Posted:Sep 8, 2009 5:59 pm
Last Updated:Sep 14, 2009 4:14 pm
6499 Views
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I'm sure that most people here are familiar with the movie, "The Bucket List" Starred Morgan Freeman and Jack Nicholson. Both men are about to die when they meet by chance sharing a hospital room. They start building a list of things that they want to see or do before their time is up. And then one by one they do them, together.
I've decided to create my own bucket list. Not because I'm croaking. We're all about to die, just some of us sooner than others. I'm creating mine because I don't know how long my body will be able to do the things I want it to do. I'm so fed up with physicians right now... but I digress.
There are so many things I want to do, so little money and an unknown amount of time that I'm not sure where to begin. So, so many things!
I once had this dream that I was swimming with a humpback whale. At first I was wary and I had on all kindsa scuba stuff. As the dream went on and the closer I got to shore the less I needed scuba and in the end apparently I had secret gills. I was swimming with dolphins, wild dolphins not the ones they piled into a corral in Cancun. I love the ocean and would much rather spend time there face down with a mask and snorkel than just about anywhere else in the world. I've snorkeled allover the northern hemisphere and very close to the equator but I've never been to the Great Barrier Reef or to the one that lies in our own Gulf of Mexico. Perhaps that should go on the list.
Most of my list will be about nature, so if you're not a nature person you might as well leave now. I don't want to go to NYC or Paris or any other big city. I do want to go to the Ngoro-Ngoro Crater in Tanzania, the Masai Mara in Kenya, the Serengeti to watch the great wildebeest migration. And for some reason I'd like to go where forest elephants live and see them in the wild. Patagonia in South America, the Amazon Rain Forest, perhaps Machu Pichu, Angel Falls. You can keep Antarctica, I can see other penguins in South America. I'd like to go to the Galapogos before tourists ruin it. Tundra Buggy watching polar bears? Hmm I dunno, have to think about that one. I'd love to go to Alaska and see the brown/grizzly bears during the salmon run. Then there is a cave system in Mexico where there are GIANT crystal formations, crystals that are stories tall, all different colors.
Yeah I know, I'm one of the biggest nerds ever. Everyday I learn something new and everyday I'm blown away by life on earth. The sad thing about this is, I can't take my sweetie with me to these places. He loves to hunt, he can do that on his own time. Unfortunately the people that really, really get me are both male and one of them is dead. I blame him for making me this way, the other is my . We can talk on the phone for hours about the weather or about a fossil he found, even just a dumb ole rock. It will be interesting to see who his baby girl turns out to be like. Time will tell. I'll just put her in the bucket and take her with me.
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Things I Love
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Posted:Sep 6, 2009 3:18 pm
Last Updated:Sep 7, 2009 5:14 pm
6439 Views
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I miss you, the smell of your skin, the taste of your breath, the feel of your tongue on mine. I like the way your cock kinda curves upward like your cock itself whats to find my G spot.
I love the way sex and the preliminaries feel. Your hands on my body, seeking out the places that make my breath quicken. Doing the things that make me moan with pleasure. You knowing that at any minute I will no longer be able to bear it and beg you to fuck me. Fuck me deep, fuck me hard. I want to hear those sounds you make just before your release and know that "I" made you make those noises.
Then, after. That, place where my body is so happy that it can't comprehend moving. My brain thinks silly things like I wish you could be inside me forever. Wouldn't tha took silly though?
Can we repeat all this I wonder to myself. I put my hand on your cock. Of course we can it says to me. I lick around the rim of it. Hear you draw in a sharp breath, as if I've hurt you. I know I haven't but I ask anyway. Of course you didn't hurt me you say.
I get this great plan in my head. I ask you to show me what you want me to do to you by you demonstrating on me first.
Somewhere in the next few minutes I realize that this was such an unfair thing to do to you. Cause I know I can't be doing the same thing you're doing to me simultaneously to you. You don't seem to care, absorbed in the work of tasting every single petal of my flower. I reach the point of no return. Going higher and higher up the mountain side only to leap off the top willingly. Plummeting with dizzying quickness, only to slowly float the last 50 feet to the bottom of the mountain. I remain in a cocoon like safety and happiness for the next few minutes.
I decide to ride your stiff, hard cock with my face. Sometimes stopping long enough to take your balls in my mouth and suck them gently, twirling them with my tongue. Soon enough you make the same sounds I made 15 minutes or so ago only you plunge to earth without so much as a parachute.
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oww, not
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Posted:Sep 6, 2009 2:55 pm
Last Updated:Sep 14, 2009 4:14 pm
6335 Views
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I work with doctors daily when I'm at work, doctors that I care about and respect. However they are ER doctors, they don't have a private practice.
All week I've been calling 2 doctors trying to get them to refill some medications from them and have yet o hear a single word from them. So now I hurt. My back is killing me every time I move. So I've resorted to the world's oldest analgesic.... I'm kinda drunk. Least my back isn't killing me now. Stupid Doctors!
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My Baby's Baby
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Posted:Aug 31, 2009 11:42 pm
Last Updated:Sep 6, 2009 2:55 pm
6520 Views
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Yeah, yeah, so I'm redundant. What can I say? I like talking to myself about the same old shit, we all already know this! So I'll talk about something new!
Our new baby has a name now. They're home from the hospital and according to her parents she is SUPERBABY! They say she turns over all by herself, she's 4 days old, I'll believe it when I see it! She wants to breastfeed all the time (I'm sure some of you guys can empathize).
She wanted to nurse for like 15 hours today so her daddy bought her a pacifier, it keeps her pacified for about 30 minutes. He says she uses her fingers and wraps them around the handle thingy on the paci and plucks it from her mouth and then screams bloody murder.
He sent a dozen pictures he took when she was born. He sent them to my sister too only she's so computer inexperienced that she didn't know how to open them. I dunno what she was doing. So I created a new gmail account for her, sent the pictures to that account and we both logged in at the same time so I could walk her through it. UGH!
I texted him and suggested that he set up an account on one of the photo sharing sites. She's got the fattest little cheeks, I just wanna eat her up!
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Grand
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Posted:Aug 28, 2009 2:02 am
Last Updated:Aug 30, 2009 6:21 am
6483 Views
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We have a new addition to our family. A baby girl who weighed a whopping 8 pounds and 10 ounces and currently has no name.
I've secretly cried off and on all day cause I want to be there so badly. My is just amazed with her. Says they've just been looking at her all day. No one seems to have a phone with a camera so I haven't seen her yet. Has a head full of dark hair.
They're coming here in two or three weeks. They currently live up north. They (the parents) met while living in Florida. They both agree that it's too cold where they are now.
Time to shut myself down and go to sleep.
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Sheesh
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Posted:Aug 26, 2009 11:40 pm
Last Updated:Aug 27, 2009 12:24 pm
6429 Views
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So yesterday I go out to the mailbox and pull in about 4 days worth of mail. In this assortment of postal delights is a card with my name on it. It's not my birthday, who is sending me a card and why?
I recognize the handwriting, there is no return address or name on the card envelope. It's from a guy that I haven't even seen in three years. Why haven't I seen him? He lives 70 miles away and he's an asshole.
He says something like, I never throw anything away and I came across your address and wanted to catch you up on all that's been going on in my life medically speaking.
Ya know if I haven't spoken to you in three years, I probably have a good enough reason. I don't care what's been going on in your life medically, asshole... I'll just tell you guys what I wanna say, since I'm not returning his mail or email or phone or anything!
Got sent home from work early because there was not enough work to go around. Favorite complaint of the night....
18 year old pregnant chick, 30 weeks along... there's something coming out of my vagina and it's getting bigger and bigger. Uhmmm, it's called a baby.
Speaking of which, I should be a granny by morning 
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My Dirty, Shameless Brain ;)
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Posted:Aug 25, 2009 1:56 pm
Last Updated:Sep 6, 2009 2:55 pm
6517 Views
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I went to the post office today to send some gifts to who is soon to be the father of my grand . I was at the desk getting the package set up to be mailed.
Usually the post office is a bustling place. I was there at lunch time, I was the only customer there.
One of the employees was cleaning up, throwing away bits of paper, putting things back into their proper place. She looks at the man who is helping me mail the gifts and says, "Oh no, Lisa forgot to change the date on her stamper," She holds up the thing that they stamp the receipts with. The man replies,"that's usually the first thing she does when she opens her station too."
About that time Lisa comes round the corner. The other female employee tells her that she's forgot to change the date and therefore everything she's stamped today will have yesterdays date on it. She grabs the stamper thingy and looks at it. She says, "OH NO!" "I've been such a bad girl, I deserve to be punished!"
My brain can turn anything into something dirty, transform the simplest sentence into innuendo. In this case I didn't have to, she'd done all the work for me.
I've never been behind the front wall of a post office, I have no idea what's back there. In my imagination however, as soon as the post office closed it turned into a dungeon. Lisa is tied spread eagle, nude with her front to the wall while Bobby (the guy that helped me mail the gifts) has a cat-o-nine-tails after her. She gasps in pleasure/pain with every strike of the whip. (another thing I just don't get) The other female employee, who appears to be of retirement age is taking pictures. I quickly put her clothing back on in my head.
She unties Lisa, flips her around, reties her facing her butt to the wall. She takes the stamper and stamps allover Lisa's body, turning her red with the correct date this time, showing that if she could be mailed it would be from Over Yonder, Al. She shakes her head and says, "that'll teach you not to change the date on your stamper, won't it, bitch!?!" Lisa can only nod yes as she has a ball-gag in her mouth.
As soon as I stepped out the doors into the sunlight I began to giggle to myself. I passed a man getting out of his car as I was walking to mine. He nodded and said hi, I just gave him my smirky, crooked lil smile. Guess he wondered what I'd been up to today.
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Hind Sight is 20/20
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Posted:Aug 24, 2009 2:03 pm
Last Updated:Aug 25, 2009 10:33 am
6565 Views
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I decidedto look at the posts I did from a year ago, just to compare what my life is like now to what it was a year ago. Only, I wasn't posting at this time a year ago.
I thought I'd found the right spot cause I saw the word August but it was from 2 years ago. I was blogging then about the same shit I blog about now. I appear to be stuck.
I was whining about my job, my health and even my frigging trouble making, clepto nephew who is still doing everything the same too.
I'm stuck in my behaviors and not sure what to do. Life is always about payoff. What am I getting, what's my reward for being stuck in the same place?
I hate change and perhaps that's all there is to this. The only sure thing however is change, time waits for no one etc.
I used to go to therapy, my therapist was this really great woman who is younger than me. Hilarious and wise at the same time. This was about the same time the WWJD wrist bands came out. We changed it to WWPD... what would a prudent person do.
I'd have to say that a prudent person would probably stay away from crazy people. Crazy folks upset me. Most of the time I'm a rational person but get me involved with my psycho family members and I forget WWPD. Sometimes I take the WWJD to heart and try to act like I could have that same kind of influence over them, but we all know you can't change anyone, you can only change yourself.
Speaking of changing, I have to take a bath and go to my 's apartment. she wants me to cook for her.
Have a good night. W
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Yada, Yada, Yada
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Posted:Aug 23, 2009 10:54 pm
Last Updated:May 21, 2024 10:37 am
6332 Views
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I some times see myself akin to a planet circling the sun, I'm held in place by gravity, some pulling, others pushing on me. Or maybe like a domino, ya know how you stand them up and knock them down. One falls, then the next and the next but if the set up is wrong they won't fall the way you want them to.
Kinda like being in the food chain. You can be at the top or at the bottom simultaneously. Or maybe karma. What goes around comes around.
I especially believe this when it comes to gossip. Or being mean. Sometimes even embellishment.
Hey Frank, look, I'm tired and not making any sense, just the way you like it 
Earlier in the week I had to start taking prednisone again. Taken in high doses, it makes me manic. Also makes me sweat like I've been digging a ditch! Lovely thought, ugh.
I should be getting a grandaughter any day now, she's 2 days overdue. Last ultrasound, she's beautiful. Cute 'lil turned up nose and pouty lips. She'll be my first and probably last.
OK back to skimming the last of the Twilight series.
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