Oklahoma Convenience Stores
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Posted:Jan 3, 2008 10:47 am
Last Updated:Jan 27, 2008 2:45 am
74544 Views
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I've noticed something about this area. The convenience stores have some of the weirdest, suggestive names I've ever seen. So, while down in Checotah with that woman who STILL hasn't signed the permission slip so I can link to her, *grumble* I got pictures of shops that I thought had the most amusing and obscene names. In the words of Tom Lehrer, "When correctly viewed, everything is lewd."
Well, I do consider these stores to have lewd names. For instance, when I saw this one, I couldn't stop laughing. But this isn't even the best of the names. I'm saving that for next time. This one was in Checotah.
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Am I Reading This Right?
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Posted:Jan 2, 2008 12:32 pm
Last Updated:Jan 17, 2008 10:24 am
75363 Views
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You know, I so rarely get mail since moving. Yes, once in a great while there's one worth answering, most aren't even worth mentioning here. Hate mail has fallen off to zero, which really amazes me considering how much I got up north. But every once in a while, I get one that makes my brain want to explode. Yesterday was one of those days.
Now, it just might be the raging hormones and cramps that caused this to get to me. Or this guy could just be a raving idiot. I'll let you decide.
hello Ann,
I am very interested in you. If you have sex is it just for your own pleasure? have you ever thought that you should have been a man/think you were in a previous life? have you ever made love to a female? are you touchy feely? or only in privacy of home..well if at all interested let me know...huggs
Now wait a minute... If a woman feels she should get something from sex other than being used as a collection of holes, she should have been born a man? What sort of fucked up thinking is that? Or am I reading too much into this?
This is the response I wanted to send him, but held back:
Hi.
I have to ask. Are you a complete idiot? Women aren't allowed to have sex for their own pleasure and if a woman cares about being satisfied, she was obviously a man in a previous life? What sort of fucked-up antediluvian thinking is that? Are all you men in this godforsaken state so backwards that you still consider women nothing but the sum of her holes for your own pleasure?
It's men like you that make me pray to every single God and Goddess out there every day that I return to NYC sooner than later and get out of this Baptist infested hellhole where there is no respect or care for women.
As a matter of fact, men with your attitude don't want women. You want free hookers. Sorry, but if you want someone to use just for the sum of her holes, there are a number of shops in this town where you can buy the blow-up doll of your dreams. Oh, that's right. You're probably one of these losers who thinks that's paying for sex. So the hookers on 11th St. are out too, I guess.
It's time for you to come out of the 1950s and step into the 1970s. Women have been liberated. We are allowed to have sex for our pleasure. Your orgasm is not our orgasm.
I'd suggest the next time you write to someone with an IQ over 80 (which I'm sure is where yours is,) you might want to learn to read, so you can read her profile and not send such antiquated drivel. Or at least get voice software that can read it for you. So you don't have to tax your little blond brain, cupcake.
OK. Being it is that time of month, I do have a tendency to fly off the handle. I'm in abject agony and Advil isn't helping. So, after asking a few friends, I was advised not to send that.
Mind you, this isn't the first time he's written to me since I got here. He doesn't remember me spanking him the last time. I also know from the roomie and a few months ago when this guy wrote, that he's on all the other popular dating sites too, where he has profiles that claim he's not a guy who acts the way he did in this email. I have seen his profiles on Match and POF. I doubt he writes to straight women on there asking if they dig chicks.
So instead, I just sent him this:
Hello doc,
I really do think you're overtaxing your little blond brain here. Why do you think a woman who doesn't want to be used as the sum of her holes for someone else's pleasure should have been born a man? What sort of antediluvian thinking is that, cupcake?
If you had bothered to read the chart, you would see that I'm straight. So why would you ask if I dig chicks? What about you? A bit of repressed homosexuality going on there? Have you ever gotten on your knees and sucked dick while a woman watched and jerked off? Rough trade in the park to make the threat of discovery more dangerous? One of those fake straights, who's worried about being kicked out of the congregation, are you?
Sorry, but as you seem to be looking for nothing but notches in the bedpost, I'd advise you to look elsewhere. I'm not a fucktoy to fulfill the fantasies of anyone who asks. I'm a woman with a mind and an IQ in the mid-triple digits. My great grandmother was a suffragette and the entire concept of women are humans and not things predates women's liberation in my family. But good luck finding the mindless June Cleaver of your dreams.
MissAnn
Yeah, I'm sure it's still a bit strong, but I'm also sure it gets the point across.
Now watch. It will turn out he's into forced femme to the point of giving blow-jobs to men to please his Mistress. That would be just my luck.
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Selective Vegetarianism
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Posted:Jan 1, 2008 3:28 pm
Last Updated:Jan 20, 2008 1:28 pm
84315 Views
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One of the fun things about having no exterior communications is talking to the people you live with. I had a few interesting conversations with the while the phone and DSL were out. But the best had to be Christmas as I was making dinner.
Yes, I was cooking red meat and in the middle of it, the boy tells me he'll eat the potatoes and other veggies, but not the meat, as at that very moment, he decided he was becoming a vegetarian.
Now, I was a vegetarian for over 20 years before I gave it up. For one, it wasn't pissing people off properly anymore and for another, well, I discovered how we tend to ingest insects. Yes, it wasn't until I had chewed and swallowed that I realized that spinach omelette I was eating at the diner had a dead roach in it. Granted, it's not the first time a roach has been in frozen spinach. But it's the first time I actually ate half if it, instead of tossing everything. That was the moment I said screw it and drove to McDonald's.
But as a result, I'm not one of those alarmist types when someone announces they don't want to eat meat anymore. If you don't, good for you! If you do, good for you too! I don't care. I don't force my morals down the throats of others. I see nothing wrong with an omnivore or a vegetarian diet. But a vegetarian diet has to be done properly and for the right reasons. And with the boy, as he's a football player and does most things half-assed, I voiced my concerns.
Well, my first question was, "what's her name?"
We all know that when a teenage boy announces something like that a girl is involved. It would seem it's one of his best friends. He told me, she just "suggests" things she feels he should do and then gives him literature to read on the subject and lets him make up his own mind. While I was cooking, he was reading this alarmist pamphlet from PETA.
I don't like PETA. They lie and exaggerate and use scare tactics. They are determined to make everyone just like them and remove free will. I didn't like them when I was a vegetarian. I used to get mailings from them. Some of them actually told people to break ties with friends and family that refused to take up a vegetarian diet. WTF is that? That's a cult tactic. I was never one of those people who objected to others at the table eating meat. I don't like PETA finding one factory farm that's breaking all sorts of rules and then claiming it's ALL farms that do that.
But I sat down and read the pamphlet. It's full of gross exaggerations and propaganda. It's also aimed at teenagers. It has such tidbits in it as all poultry farmers cut off the beaks of live chickens. That there's a ton of diseased pus in milk. That all cows are fed growth hormones and anti-biotics. That dairy cows are treated more cruelly as veal cows.
Look, I know that poultry farmers are being exploited by Tyson across the south. I personally won't buy anything of Tyson's. Their labor practices suck more than Wal*Mart and they exploit farmers who are desperate to keep their dirt farms going. I know what these chicken farms have done to the south. I also know in large metropolitan areas, it's hard to buy local meats. But to make claims that all farmers do that, when all you really have to do is drive ten minutes out of town to see farms raising black angus and smaller chicken coops and things like that, you take things like PETA's propaganda with a grain of salt. Unless of course, you're an impressionable who doesn't recognize terrorist tactics when you see them.
So after I read the pamphlet, I started asking the boy questions. I was told he wasn't going to eat meat or eggs anymore, as the methods are so cruel. He's not going to drink milk because dairy farming is cruel, but he's going to eat cheese and ice cream. Yes, I managed to keep my head from exploding when I heard that. I also managed to not start laughing at him. But then it got better.
The boy has applied at Taco Bell. So I said to him, "so Man , (my nickname for him that he hates and I find ever so amusing,) if you get that job at Taco Bell, does that mean you're going to bring me home your Crunch Wrap Supremes instead of eating what came from factory farms?"
That's when I was informed he wasn't going to not eat meat except at restaurants. He's 16. To him, a restaurant IS Taco Bell. That's when I wanted to start screaming at him that he was a hypocrite. But in spite of the raging PMS, I didn't. I also didn't start laughing at him. I just mumbled something about a fake vegetarian.
Then I started plotting mentally. At first, I thought maybe it was my cooking. But I know it isn't. And it couldn't have been what I was cooking for dinner. A friend of the roomie's showed up right before Christmas with a 20 pound uncut slab of NY Strip Steak. OMG, I have never dealt with meat that tender or good before outside of filet mignon. You can cut this meat with a fork. It's fucking amazing. This is what he turned down because of a PETA pamphlet.
But then I realized when I make "fun" food, the boy can't get enough. Like lasagna. Or stuffed cabbage. Or even my spaghetti sauce, which I had to learn to make from scratch here, as I can't get my cheat sauce here. So it's one of those four hour projects when I make it.
I realized when I was a vegetarian, which I attempted the first time at his age, my mother would make a small pan of meatless lasagna for me. She'd make vegetarian stuffed cabbage. We worked on that one together. Stuffing the cabbage with this mix of rice, minced mushrooms, shredded carrots and spices. So mentally, I started planning. "Oh, here's a small pan of the vegetarian version for you," I thought to myself as I plotted.
But then came the question of where will he get enough protein, if he's cutting out animal products. He planned on going to an all-ramen diet. Yeah. I pointed out there's only one flavor of ramen with no animal products in it and that ramen is not a significant source of protein.
So, we talked about tofu. He has no idea what that is. Let's face it. People who can eat tofu in cubes are those who became vegetarians because they don't like the taste of meat. It has to be done properly. If you cook it wrong, it turns into rubber. Tasteless rubber. I actually went for those roasted salted soy beans and soy "meats" instead of tofu myself. I still prefer Worthington's Meatless Wham to real ham. Something to do with less salt than real ham.
But the boy had no idea of how to do things properly as far as sports nutrition goes. He seems to think a diet of ramen, peanut butter and jelly and chocolate will be adequate. Yeah, I thought such things would be adequate too when I was his age and tried the first time. It was when my periods stopped and my hair started falling out that I gave it up, did my research and went at it again with an education. But we had something that I can't find in this area. At least, not where the boy could get to easily. I'm talking natural groceries. Places where you can find all the things you need to be a vegetarian properly. This is cattle country. As a matter of fact, the closest natural foods store to us has an on-line store... All natural, free range beef, chicken, fish, sausage... Yeah. In spite of the boy telling me I only do things like walk home with groceries we actually need like right that moment is because I have "nothing better to do", he needs to think again if he thinks I'm wasting my time on the bus hunting down vegetarian products for him.
But then, he went out to his best friend's. Then the roomie got home. I explained the boy's lifestyle change and I was told he'd take care of it. Well, they missed each other during the day that day, but I knew the entire idea of vegetarianism was already lost when the boy announced he was hungry and made himself two hotdogs instead of something vegetarian. Yes, he turns down gorgeous steak, but goes right for the crap hotdogs. Like dude, WTF?
Then came the meeting of the minds. The boy was told, go ahead, become a vegetarian, but talk to his football coach first to see how practical it is. Then pay for the special needs vegetarian products himself. The lowest of blows. Cutting into the boy's gaming budget.
So teenage rebellion was nipped in the bud. For the moment, at any rate.
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Lovely, Lovely, Internet
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Posted:Dec 31, 2007 8:30 pm
Last Updated:Jan 2, 2008 9:25 am
73742 Views
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No phone. No DSL. No TV, as the Dish runs off of the landline and all I got was a message about having to have the phone connected. In other words, nearly two weeks of being cut off from the world. I'm pretty sure I'm clinically insane at this point. Anyone miss me?
I went through just about every movie in this house, other than war movies, Star Trek, chick flicks and based on Marvel Comics. Hell, I even started on the Marvel Comics movies and watched one of the chick flicks. Whoever decided Vince Vaughn and Owen Wilson were romantic comedy material should have their heads examined.
Any news I've gotten has been from word of mouth. How bad has it been here? Some woman's house was robbed here in Tulsa after most power was restored, (some people still don't have power,) and her alarm didn't go off, because the phones weren't working. That's the ONLY news I've heard since getting back to town. Did I miss Trent Lott's going away party? Any good scandals?
*Sigh* It feels so good to have Internet back. I felt like I had a limb amputated. I know that sounds dramatic. But it really is how I felt. Like part of me was missing. It really is amazing how much we rely on the Internet. If we want a recipe we don't have, we do a search. If we want to check to see who someone is in some movie we're watching, we hit the IMDb, without having to take our eyes off the movie. Song lyrics we can't remember? No problem! Just do a search! The wind speed velocity of an unladen swallow? Yep. There's even a website that analyzes that. Both European and African. The list goes on. So yeah. It felt like a part of me was gone.
As the guy from AT&T was fixing everything, I was talking to him. They're not even getting New Year's off. They're doing mandatory 12 hour days and crews from all over the country have been called in. He told me they were lucky to get Christmas day off. They did the 12 hour day on Christmas Eve.
Tulsa is still a mess. There are still limbs and cut up tree trunks at the curb in front of every house. It's too bad so few houses in this area have fireplaces. There's free firewood and tons of it all over town. This neighborhood alone could keep a small Eskimo village in firewood for a few years. But things are finally returning to normal.
So, how have you all been? How was Christmas?
Oh yeah. Happy New Year, everyone!
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14
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Christmas Coffee
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Posted:Dec 21, 2007 9:38 am
Last Updated:Jan 1, 2008 1:25 am
74549 Views
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I've been drinking a lot of this. It's yummy and something that is low maintenance. I thought I'd share it with you all, because as I said in my previous post, I probably won't be online before Christmas.
One Coffee Mug
1 - 2 miniature candy canes
1 TBSP chocolate syrup
Coffee
Milk
Crush or break the candy cane(s) into the bottom of your coffee mug. Add the syrup. Pour hot coffee in and stir until the candy cane is dissolved. Add milk. Enjoy!
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Tulsa Bound
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Posted:Dec 21, 2007 9:35 am
Last Updated:Mar 16, 2008 9:00 pm
73553 Views
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This afternoon, I'm going back to Tulsa. The roomie has electric again. There are still some households that don't have electric and in at least one town to the north of Tulsa, they're telling the residents they might have their electric back on by Christmas.
I won't have Internet for a while. The storm ripped off that phone company grounding box from the side of the house. AT&T are taking their dear sweet time sending someone out to fix it. So, if they don't get it in gear by Tuesday, let me say to you all now, Merry Christmas!
What do I want for Christmas? Working Internet. A winning Powerball ticket. I don't mean a $2 winner either. I mean the big prize. The roof fixed. When we went on the Tulsa rescue right after the storm, we stopped by the house to get a few things and the ceiling in my room was leaking. I guess a branch ripped off some part of the roof. Everything on my Amazon wish list. A pack of Butterscotch Krimpets and those Christmas Peppermint Kandy Kakes. Can you believe no one here has ever heard of Tastykakes? A huge case of Dove Milk Chocolate Christmas Promises. They're different from the regular ones.
A government research grant to find out how many bites it takes to get to the center of every flavor of a Tootsie Pop. And if saliva acidity, gender, age, etc. make a difference. I tried again with another flavor a few weeks ago and it was over 500 licks. For Dick Cheney to resign. For Condi Rice to come out of the closet. For James Dobson to lose all credibility among all his followers. For Mike Huckabee to learn the difference between a necrophiliac and a homosexual the hard way. For Mitt Romney to stop being a fucking hypocrite. For Rudy Giuliani to get the fuck over himself. What am I saying? I've been waiting for that since before he was Mayor of NYC. For Ann "the cuntscab" Coulter to finally get the mental help she needs so desperately. For a cease fire in Iraq. For no invasion of Iran. For people to remember the war in Afghanistan drags on.
For the refrigerator not to smell like two week old rot when I get home. To get over this fucking inner ear/sinus infection. That episode of "The Simpsons" where all the single people in town try to do away with anything family friendly and are all fallen by germs before they can vote on it is so true. I want to pierce my left ear drum.
I want a DVD copy of "Santa Claus Conquers The Martians." Pure cheese, but a lot of fun.
For the new owners of this site to take our complaints and concerns seriously. I just may get that open letter to Marc H. Bell posted someday. Things go wrong every time I try.
Merry Christmas everyone!
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You Know...
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Posted:Dec 15, 2007 10:01 am
Last Updated:Jan 2, 2008 11:46 am
74513 Views
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I fucking HATE Internet Explorer. When something like this site decides to malfunction in Firefox and takes you to the GOD DAMNED FUCKING SECURE ORDER FORM WHEN YOU'RE TRYING TO FUCKING SPELL CHECK YOUR DAMNED POST, you can hit the back button and all your text is right there. Not with this piece of shit Microsoft idiot browser. Motherfucking Bill Gates needs to be taken out, his skin flayed off, then drawn and quartered and his head stuck on a spike in the town square of Redmond, Washington.
I had written a post about the acquisition of Various, Inc by Penthouse that was pithy, took everything into consideration and was brilliant, if I say so myself. It's gone. Lost forever, because Microsoft is run by fucking idiots.
Firefox people. Firefox will let you hit back, forward and as long as you don't shut the window on purpose, your text will remain.
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10
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Santa's Train
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Posted:Dec 12, 2007 2:12 pm
Last Updated:Aug 10, 2008 11:16 pm
84359 Views
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I want you to take a good look at the picture. It looks so sweet and innocent and like something you'd put on your lawn if you had $100 or so to blow on a decoration, right? It inflates, has lights inside and movement. It's the movement that got my perverted mind going.
One day last week as the nice lady with whom I'm staying ran into the store, I stayed in the truck with the youngest girl and this was on the sidewalk in front of us. We amused ourselves by watching it. But as I watched it, I realized that this innocent little thing was designed by someone with a filthy mind.
Take a very good look. Done? While it's obvious Santa Claus is pulling a train, it gets worse. That penguin in the middle sits and spins and the one at the end of the train pops out of the gift. It's a Santa stag party orgy, I'm telling you!
Or, I could just have a filthy mind. Whichever.
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I Take Back
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Posted:Dec 11, 2007 1:45 pm
Last Updated:Dec 14, 2007 1:27 pm
73984 Views
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So yesterday, the nice lady with whom I'm staying and I went on a rescue in downtown Beirut. Er, I mean Tulsa. It just looks like a war zone.
The call came in the morning. Her friend lost power overnight and was freezing, had no food in her house, a large tree branch on her car, a tree branch falling had ripped the meter off the back of her house. So, we were off.
Here in Checotah, there was little ice and it was warmish. Well, to me anyway. Ice was sticking to brush plants, making them look all pretty.
"Ooooh, pretty!" was my battle cry for the first part of the trip. By the time we got as far north as Coweta, we were seeing trees weighed down by ice, ice on the power lines, places without electricity and broken trees. But that didn't prepare us for Tulsa.
We got off the highway and while the main roads were mostly clear, every side street was impassible, from broken trees to downed power lines. I'm from the Northeast and I've never seen ice like this before. It was at least an inch thick on everything, making trees and plants look like they were coated in glass. Very pretty, but also very dangerous.
When we got to her friend's house, the only place to park was under a tree that was making creaking noises. I stayed in the truck and I was very, very nervous about it. But they got her bags and her in the truck and we were off.
We made a stop for me to get a few things from the house and once again extended an invitation to the roomie to come on down. But he has a new job and gas is too expensive for him to commute an hour each way at the moment. So he stayed to hold down the fort. Last I heard, a friend of his in town had power and she was taking in all her friends with no power.
We picked up movies and I picked up clothes, as well, I was only supposed to be here a few days. I also got my back-scratcher, as I've missed that most of all.
Then we were off. The traffic in my neighborhood was incredible, as there's a Wal*Mart about a mile away that was on generator power. Scott told me to stop by there and check out the carnage, but even if we had wanted to, we never would have gotten into the parking lot. It was worse than a mall an hour before closing on Christmas Eve.
We finally made it to the highway and were off. We got back here only to find out her friend's dog, a Shih-Tsu, fell in love with the miniature Dachshund immediately. He's still making googly eyes at that dog, who is now willing to play with him, but not willing to get involved. The looks he gives her are incredibly cute. Even when napping, he lays where he can wake up and gaze upon her. I've been freaking people out by saying, "their puppies would be so cute! A furry Shih-Tsu head with a Dachshund body!"
I seem to be the only one that amuses.
But Tulsa is really bad. They finally declared a state of emergency last night for the entire state, even though the high plains west of Oklahoma City didn't seem to be affected. Hospitals have been on generator power. The top priorities in restoring power are the hospitals and the airport. The original estimates of 22,000 without power in Tulsa were under-exaggerated grossly. It's more like 230,000 plus without power. It's a bad scene and residential areas are being considered the lowest priority. People can expect to be without power for a week to ten days. I think that estimate might be a bit low.
What I think really sucks is the power company has announced that anyone who has had their meter torn off by the storm has to hire a licensed electrician to reattach it before power can be restored to their homes. I think that's cheap and chintzy of them. The meters belong to the fucking power company, so they should deal with them. Not to mention, the people in that position are probably toughing things out with generators or in the shelters that have been set up and are news deprived. Which means they have no idea they have to take care of this themselves.
I wish I had taken my camera yesterday. The damage I saw was insane. The picture in yesterday's post just doesn't do it justice. I wouldn't be surprised if a few people ended up freezing to death because they're stuck in their houses, can't get out thanks to downed power lines and branches and can't call for help.
Now it's pouring, teeming rain and while it's staying warm down here, Tulsa is expected to freeze once again overnight. The morning news should be interesting.
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Ice, Ice Baby!
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Posted:Dec 10, 2007 9:12 am
Last Updated:Dec 13, 2007 10:44 pm
74030 Views
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Ice has been falling out of the sky in Eastern Oklahoma for about 24 hours now. The picture is a current picture of ice in Tulsa. Tens of thousands are without power, in a state where fireplaces are lacking in houses. Even the airport is without power today.
I'm still out on the farm, where it isn't so bad. Schools are open today for some reason and a little while ago when it started to rain badly, it wasn't ice falling, but rain. Which melted some spots on the deck and made others even more slick.
TV stations are blinking in and out. Ice is snapping wires just about everywhere in the northern part of the state. Local websites are down, they must be using local servers who have no real backup plan.
Friday was the anniversary of a massive ice storm that hit last year. This ice storm missed hitting on the anniversary by about 32 hours. I think it would have been a trip if it had hit on the same day. Just to see if it could start any legends about that day or something.
It's quiet out here. Just the sound of the rain and the dogs. One of the dogs started barking her head off. I opened the door to see what she was barking at and she took off. In that instant BEFORE I got a wiff of skunk. I always thought they were nocturnal. They were in NJ. But with this weather, I'm sure all sorts of critters are on the move. Last night the wolves or coyotes or whatever they were did NOT sound happy. But this little isn't coming back when I call her and I have visions of her coming back reeking to high heaven. This isn't a who likes the cold, she doesn't have a heavy coat. It's pouring rain again and she's still not back. So yeah, I'm worried about this dog. I can see her running up to the skunk and wanting to play. Anyone have any tomato juice?
But I'm amazed at how a little ice brings down the area. OK, so maybe it's not just a little ice. But now I'm dying to see how they cope with snow around here.
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Posted:Dec 5, 2007 11:40 pm
Last Updated:Dec 16, 2007 8:04 pm
88157 Views
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"You got a problem with that, damn Yankee?"
"No, just an observation."
That was dinner conversation tonight.
I've been vegging out for the past week in the country with a certain blogger who STILL hasn't filled out her permission slip, so I'm not naming her. HA! But I did actually make that comment as her youngest asked for yet more gravy on her plate.
I really haven't had much to say in the past week, as well, I've mostly been looking at the stars at night. It's amazing what you can see down here. The Orion Nebula is ever so clear. You can see the belt of the Milky Way. Sure, it looks like a cloud instead if millions of stars, but it's been years since I've seen that. Come to think of it, it's been years since I've been able to see any constellations other than Orion, Cassiopeia, Ursa Major and wait, that's it. Even when I was in the countryside of NJ, it was like a cosmic black hole. I remember one night when everyone, including people in Philly could see the Aurora Borealis. It was a big thing a few years back, it was supposed to be visible in most of the continental United States. I couldn't see it. People a town over could see them, but I couldn't. *sigh* Light pollution from the highway, which was about a mile north. So being able to see the various constellations is a big thing.
From here, I can see the Pleiades, Pegasus, Cancer, Gemini, Cygnus... I had forgotten Cygnus was even in the sky! This is one that freaked me out as a , as my grandfather referred to it as the Northern Cross and told us stories about that being God watching.
What's really cool is, I can't go outside at night without seeing a meteorite. The Geminids are in about a week and they're already gearing up. I'm not talking about those pale, tiny streaks of light. I mean bright and big meteorites. The kind you hope land in the backyard. In spite of that episode in "Creepshow."
This has made me yearn to find a spot miles from any lights. I mean at least ten miles from the nearest source of light pollution. A nice open field. But of course, it would be nice if this nice, open field had mown grass, no ticks, spiders or poisonous snakes. You know, Fantasyland. Or maybe the middle of the ocean. On a boat with no leaks and room service. The QEII would be nice. Yep, I'm off in Fantasyland again.
Other than looking at the night sky, I've been learning a few things:
If a 2 year old takes a liking to something such as, oh, say your shoes, they are hers. They are no longer yours. Screaming will ensue if you try to claim said item.
Braum's is much better than Friendly's.
Just about everyone in these parts is a Mason. Even tiny towns have their own Masonic lodges and some are open to the public. And here I am thinking it's areas like this that breed the conspiracy theorists.
There are parts of this country where they maintain the dirt roads, instead of paving over them.
There are parts of this country where the roads don't even have names. Just RD numbers.
Some people really do eat gravy with a spoon.
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How Schmart Is You?
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Posted:Nov 28, 2007 3:55 am
Last Updated:Dec 8, 2007 12:35 pm
76099 Views
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I rarely do crap like this, but I couldn't resist. Below are 16 brain teasers. Some have obvious answers, while others left me saying, "huh?" So I offer this up for all of you.
Remember, it's no fair searching. For the moment, I'm leaving all comments pending, as to not spoil any fun for anyone who comes in late to the party. Not to mention, on the rare occasions I do something like this, the first or second poster will be a spoil sport and post the answer.
Here are the questions. Answer as many or as few as you wish. I'll let you see each other's comments in a day or two. Have fun!
1. The maker doesn't want it; the buyer doesn't use it; and the user doesn't see it. What is it?
2. A is born in Boston, Massachusetts to parents who were both born in Boston, Massachusetts. The is not a United States citizen. How is this possible?
3. Before Mount Everest was discovered, what was the highest mountain on Earth?
4. Clara Clatter was born on December 27th, yet her birthday is always in the summer. How is this possible?
5. Captain Frank and some of the boys were exchanging old war stories. Art Bragg offered one about how his grandfather led a battalion against a German division during World War I. Through brilliant maneuvers, he defeated them and captured valuable territory. After the battle he was presented with a sword bearing the inscription "To Captain Bragg for Bravery, Daring and Leadership. World War I. From the Men of Battalion "Captain Frank looked at Art and said, "You really don't expect anyone to believe that yarn, do you?" What's wrong with the story?
6. What is one thing that all wise men, regardless of their religion or politics, agree is between heaven and earth?
7. In what year did Christmas and New Year's fall in the same year?
8. Why are 1990 American dollar bills worth more than 1989 American dollar bills?
9. A farmer has 17 sheep and all but 9 die. How many are left?
10. How many times can you subtract the number 5 from 25?
11. How could you rearrange the letters in the words "new door" to make one word? Note: There is only one correct answer.
12. Even if they are starving, natives living in the Arctic will never eat a penguin's egg. Why not?
13. Which is correct to say, "The yolk of the egg are white" or "The yolk of the egg is white"?
14. In Okmulgee, Oklahoma, you cannot take a picture of a man with a wooden leg. Why not?
15. There were an electrician and a plumber waiting in line for admission to the International Home Show," One of them was the father of the other's . How could this be possible?
16. A butcher in the butcher shop is 5' 10" tall. What does he weigh?
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Think Before You Ad.... *grumble*
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Posted:Nov 25, 2007 11:11 pm
Last Updated:Jan 9, 2008 6:19 pm
84140 Views
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"BRDR is not responding..."
MOTHERFUCKER! How the hell did this fucking malware get back on the computer? I thought I put the fear of stolen Runescape passwords into them the last time!
Now that I have that out, let me start from the beginning.
A few weeks ago, the main living room computer, which is also the TV and the DVD player started acting beyond funky. DVDs were freezing for no good reason. Applications were freezing. The didn't bother to even ask me, "what's this?" when rebooting and getting that BRDR message. So it would seem it had been happening for a while when I finally saw it.
I became suspicious immediately. I know this isn't a normal Windows function. After hunting the web relentlessly, spending hours finding one thing that promised to remove it after another, only to be told each time it would detect, but pay us anywhere from $30 to $99 for a product to remove it, I finally found manual removal instructions.
My, was that easy. I found instructions that explained it's a bit of malware that runs Think Adz. That in most cases to remove it, just go to Add/Remove programs and remove it there. I wish I had found that first. I removed it there and then got rid of the registry keys. Problem solved. To scare the fear of stolen passwords, I set the computer so anyone who uses it has to hit block cookies for third party cookies. To make them think about what they're doing online. OK, fine.
Tonight, one of the roomie's friends was over and we were all watching a DVD. It started freezing. It wasn't just freezing, it was freezing the DVD player and the computer too. So, I rebooted. On shutdown, what do I see? You guessed it.
Well, this thing does more than track you online and provide you with useless pop-up ads based on search terms. It freezes crap too. I couldn't get into Add/Remove programs without it freezing. Fine. Let's finish watching the DVD and then I'll worry about it.
On about the fourth restart, I finally got into Add/Remove programs. Guess what wasn't there? That's right, Think Adz. *sigh*
Back to look for the documentation.
OK.
Find the process running in the task manager. Check.
Run search and find the following files and delete them. Check.
Run the registry editor and remove any keys with these words. Check.
Reboot the computer. Check.
Run msconfig... Check the start up... GOD DAMNED MOTHERFUCKING SONS OF JACKAL BITCHES! It's fucking back!
I can't get rid of it this time. There has to be a registry key or something that wasn't listed in the instructions. All I know is, I give up for the night. I stopped the process, took it out of start up yet AGAIN and I'm not a happy camper.
My theory is, it's showing up through Swift Switch, which is supposed to be secure. But even though that had been shut down, it tends to run in the background too and that wasn't responding on the first close either. I know it could be a coincidence, but I'm not too sure. It's a way for Runescape players to connect to each other. I'm wondering if one infected user can use some sort of browser exploit and infect other users through that. Or if the is being dumb enough to click links to the malware that other players give him. I just know I'm sick of removing the damned thing. This time, it's proving rather daunting.
Have any of you had a computer infected with this particular program and had to go through the manual removal steps? The only thing I can think of that I did wrong was the process itself is running under a mask name. I stopped the process before searching for it in the registry or in the system files. When I rebooted, I stopped the process again. So, to find this damned file, I'm going to have to reboot again, write it down, etc., as I have to stop the process before trying to remove it from the registry.
Another thing is, the instructions said there should be two processes shown running in the Task Manager associated with this joyous piece of filth. I could only find one and trust me, I searched on the file names of everything with which I wasn't familiar. *sigh*
Any techies have any advice? And don't be a smartass and say reformat. Unless you want me to hunt you down and hurt you.
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