Reset Password
Reset Link Sent
| Blogs > UnicornAnn > Living in the Land of Unicorns |
Eulogy
|
Eulogy I just received word that my father-in-law, Mark, died. He had a heart attack. He was preceeded in death by my mother-in-law, Mindy, and my husband, Ted. I have been asked to give a eulogy at Mark's funeral by my brother-in-law and although I'm an atheist I have prepared a eulogy to give at his church. But what follows is the eulogy I wish I could give. I adored Mark. He and Mindy were an unusal couple. They met each other while Mark was playing in a band. As Mark told me, Mindy was pretty much a groupie. They hooked up and had great sex. Mark had two and Mindy had two and both were in a contested divorce with a battle over custody issues. They married to show the court a stable family enviroment and both won full custody. The secret that they never shared with the court is even though they married, they never stopped dating other people. And while they lived their seperate lives Mark was a romantic and actually fell in love with Mindy. They're agreement was when the youngest turned 18 they would divorce and go they're seperate ways, but when that time came Mindy left a note for Mark saying "if you want to stay together leave a rose in the mailbox." When Mindy came home from work the mailbox and house was filled with roses. After Ted was killed I learned that Mark and Mindy were in the lifestyle. A couple years after Ted was killed Mark asked me to be "his date" so he could get into a party that didn't allow single men. (there's a post below about a friend that asked me to go to party to get him in, Mark was my friend) Mark introduced me to the lifestyle. I can't say that in church, but I needed to say it. Mark showed me there is life after death and we must go on after loosing someone we love. I adored Mark and he showed me how to live after my heart was ripped out with the death of my husband. Mark helped me setup my account on Couples Dating and encouaged me to "go out and live." Sorry if this post is a downer, but I need closure and need to say what I can't say in a church. Ann Sometimes I want to be a naive young woman and sometimes I want to be a slut, but I always want to be treated with respect.  Ann |
||||
|
I went thru the same type of thing My husband passed away we were in the lifestyle for 16 years together. When I became a widow I was lost and stayed in the lifestyle and about six months after his death this couple that were our friends suggested signing up for Couples Dating so I did and i have moved on with my life and yes i do enjoy my life but I still miss my husband after 4 years. for me reading this i understand where you are coming from. LadyTeddieBear 
| |||
|
I'd say you found a liberating path out of despair...
| |||
|
sorry for your loss,no need to say/be sorry.we need to do what we need for closure.we wish you well.
| |||
|
Those are beautiful thoughts. We are very sorry for your loss.
| |||
|
Xac:  That story is so fucking beautiful!!  Ann, I am VERY sorry for your loss, and although there's a huge part of me that feels compelled to say something about the three of them being together again largely because it helps me to feel better for you, I also understand that such sentiments are borderline offensive to an Atheist, so instead I will say this. Your choice to say what you REALLY need to say and not just what others need to hear you say will make all the difference to you in the long run. When we hold back what we really need to get out after someone passes away, eventually it just becomes a pain that we learn to avoid and unfortunately, along with avoidance of that pain seems to come right along with it a lack of being able to easily embrace fond memories of those who have passed. That is how you truly make a person "dead" to you. You fail to allow yourself to recognize the fact that all of the great things about them don't cease to exist as long as your memories of them - and what they TRULY meant to you - don't cease to exist either. I'm glad you got to share what to you I'm sure was possibly one of THE most important details about Mark, one of the things you want to remember about him most. I also understand why you might have been reluctant to share it elsewhere. Our deepest condolences to you and all who knew and will miss what sounds like a pretty cool guy.
| |||
|
Xac: That bit with the mailbox and the roses is like cinema-worthy!
| |||
|
Xin: Wait, you know people who make movies! You should totally see if you can convince anyone to work that into a romance storyline somewhere. Talk about an homage to a great man! Not sure if that's really possible from where you're at in the industry or not, but I always get excited by ideas and have to share them anyway.
| |||
4/9/2016 10:36 am |
Ann, we truly are sorry for your loss. And I'm sorry this is coming so long after you posted it. Mark and Mindy both sounded like incredible people. The part about the roses was very moving.
| |||
|
Very touching to read this. Thanks for sharing.
| |||
|
Thank you for sharing this private eulogy. This is a great story of a real life love, passion and trust.
|
Become a member to create a blog
